An update

Now that the year is coming to an end, I figured it's time for an update after the end of my NYC trip a week and a half ago. I'm sitting here at night thinking so much about so many things. My life is honestly a mess right now... I seem to only be adding more stress with the choices I make and what I choose to focus on.

Here's a rundown of all the things on my mind:
a.) A man that I've been in love with since I was fourteen years old. I've been proposed to twice in my life by him and regret not accepting his proposals. He loves me with all of his heart but he's scared to be with me. Because, he knows, in his heart of hearts, that if he ever was to give his love to me... I could very well be the end of his world. So, in turn, he chooses to date men that he has very little interest in and live life knowing that he won't be hurt by the men he doesn't love. He's perfect. But he always runs away from me in the end.

b.) My ex-boyfriend.. that I still have feelings for. We dated for a couple of years and then broke up recently. Lately we've been spending more time together, which I enjoy, but we act as if we're still together.

c.) My DUI - woohoo for lawyer's costs, court fines, probation, etc. Who knows what's going to happen with this one?

d.) The opportunity to move to Chicago and restart my life. I'd be with extended family (the ones I absolutely love to pieces). This also comes with leaving the friends I've had the longest.. my father was a Commanding Officer in the Navy - we moved often. I've known everyone here for at least 4 years, if not, more. I was so used to changing friends every year and a half or two.

e.) Modeling - it's just as stressful as ever.

f.) Lack of motivation in school and other places in my life

g.) Sugar Daddies - It's a great thrill and I enjoy older men in the first place. However, it's so time consuming and exhausting. A few new pots are starting to show up - woohoo!

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I have a lot of decisions and choices to make. My mind is fried. Goodnight.


I hope you're all enjoying your holidays!

Sebastian

Apparently men with Centurion card...

Are only good for a dinner. Haha. Back into the sugar search I go!

Sebastian

Just created a Facebook!

Click on my badge and feel free to add me :)

Looking forward to talking to you all there!

I Can Have Another You in a Minute

"You must not know about me, you must not know about me. I can have another you in a minute. Matter of fact, he'll be here in a minute, baby. You must not know about me, you must not know about me, I can have another you by tomorrow. So, don't you ever for a second get to thinking you're irreplaceable."

I am the luckiest son of a bitch in the world. Shortly after being ditched by NYCSD - I decided to ditch him. Forever. So, instead, I was invited out by an older gentleman today. I told him I was busy and he asked what my schedule was like tonight - I told him I had nothing planned. We met at 11:20 at a beautiful restaurant inside a boutique hotel. It was a Japanese place. More sake and a nice NYC strip steak with onion strings. Delicious. Oh, and guess what, we were talking about airports and our funny stories - here's one he shared with me. You ALL will love this.

American Express Centurion Card

I'm sure we all know how important this card is. And what it means. Right? Well, I held it in my hand at the end of dinner today! That's right. I held it!!!! He was talking about how when he went to the airport one time the scanner went off and kept going off. TSA asked if he has anything metal, he of course didn't think of his wallet. The TSA asked if maybe he had a wallet or something on him. He gave the man his wallet, and then realized that his card is made of Titanium. When I put water on Buddha yesterday at Megu for good luck... I certainly got it!!! He's personally selecting an apartment for me to move into over by the Time Warner Building in NYC, he's also paying for ALL my expenses, all my shopping, and all my travel. We discussed this at dinner tonight. He has had one sugar baby before out in California. However, it didn't work out. But during the time they were together he provided him an apartment, luxury vehicle, allowance, etc. This is classified to me as the "you can have whatever you like" daddy. His name here will be known as "Centurion." Perfect, yes?

We had met through SA back in September and exchanged emails back and forth but didn't have the chance to meet up. So, I of course e-mail him today after what occurred. He replied half an hour later. I replied half an hour after that. Then he asked for my phone number, which I gladly provided because I was pretty desperate for something new. All of this ended in a phone call inviting me to Columbus Circle at The Shops at Time Warner. We ate and he gave me $100 for a cab home :)

Here's what I get out of our first date. Any apartment I want. He's already searching for one for me - in Midtown West! Soon, I'll be living a life of shopping, eating, traveling and sleeping. Go me! Wish me luck. How do I make sure I don't lose him? I'm not worried about it but it's something I'm scared of. I've bagged such a great guy in under an hour.

Sebastian

Update: Biggest Let Down in the Sugary World of Sebastian

So, as I sit here in my hotel room, looking out over the large window that gives me a beautiful view of Tribeca... I'm also very disappointed. After running an hour late to dinner last night, due to the subway changing their trains to express and having to reroute myself to get to my destination (I'm not the best at subways in the first place), I arrived to Megu. NYCSD was not pleased, but I felt as if I calmed him down and that my apology was appropriate. It's a beautiful restaurant and you'll be able to hear all about my experience last night shortly.. however, I feel that this update is more important.

After dinner last night, NYCSD and I walked around and went on a history walk and talked for about 45 minutes. We walked through City Hall park and smoked a few cigarettes talking about so many different things. The original news houses. George Washington's pew at the church. Hangings at City Hall Park. Where they film Ugly Betty. The most expensive building in the world. The creme de la creme of cafes back in the 60's and 70's. How Tribeca quickly became such a hot spot when it was nothing before. I enjoyed this so very much because he's so knowledgeable about the city. I have a big thing for history - I love NYC for it's history because it's the center of all of America's history. We parted ways and I was given tickets to meet with him at the Museum of Modern Arts in the early afternoon - he said he'd call. I arranged a wake-up call for 10 and 10:30. I then turned in after feeding my goldfish and went to bed.

I awoke to my wakeup calls and then went back to sleep when I had saw that I had not yet received a call. I then awoke again at 1pm. I texted, called and then texted and called again. No answers, period. Today was supposed to be my MOMA and shopping day. I didn't get it either. To have come here and enjoyed such a fine experience initially and to be let down on my last day here isn't acceptable. Much like my late arrival wasn't acceptable to one of the best restaurants in NYC last night. However, I had a very understandable reason for this. Upon realizing that MOMA closes at 5:30 today... I sent NYCSD a text.

"I appreciate your generosity during my time here. However, if you didn't show up today because of my tardiness the other night - I do apologize and completely understand. I hope your day is going well."

The one thing that I disliked the most, indeed wasn't going shopping or to the MOMA... but the fact that I was told I would receive a call from him about when to meet up today. When I didn't receive that call, it became a problem for me. Do not bring me to NYC, promise me these things, and then leave me last minute with no reason or explanation. Do not drop off the Earth and not let me know that you're not able to get together and have me wait on you the way I have.

So, instead of shopping and going and enjoying my day. I have instead been in my room with the occasional cigarette break in front of the hotel. No worries though, I'll be turning this day around with one of my friend's Isabella tonight - I'll treat her to dinner and drinks which I'll charge to the room. I was previously given permission to do so. He's responsible for the expenses I incur here because he brought me here. The goal was to pamper me and lavish me with gifts and beautiful dinners. Clearly this goal has not been met. I'll then go out to Isabella's friend's going away party before he leaves the city to work in the overseas modeling market.

For now, I won't talk to NYCSD until he comes back to me - I do hope he will. But if he doesn't there's no use crying over spilled applesauce. He's such a kind man and he's very smart. These are things that I enjoy about him. I enjoy spending time with him and both of us being entertained. But, then again, this isn't acceptable.

Going home tomorrow, I depart in the evening. I'm ready for this to be over with. And so, the search for some new sugar begins. This flame extinguished itself so quickly but I hope that it ignites once again.

Sebastian

The Hotel

UPDATED AND PICTURES ARE NOW ADDED

Note: Pictures to come.

I arrived in NYC last night after a day of travel hell. However, I made it just fine and was reimbursed for my travel expenses that I incurred on my way to the hotel from the airport - plus a nice bonus! NYCSD has been working all day so I got some time to go out and play... after being out all night until 7am. I had a vegan caesar salad at Sacred Chow with a mimosa. Other than that, I've been laying around all day waiting to get together with one of my good friends up here before I go to Megu for a lovely dinner! Sake! Sake! Sake! Did I mention, sake?!?!

I'll make sure to edit this post when I get in tonight... I'm not quite sure how long I'll be out. But I do know that I am exhausted. Shopping tomorrow!

Sebastian

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The Night Begins

After a issue with the subway, I arrived to dinner exactly fifty minutes late. NYCSD had allowed everyone that had reservations to skip in front of us until my arrival. When I arrived I was given the most terrible look I have ever been given - a look of disappointment. I sat down at the bar and was asked to order a drink. I ordered the Jade Candy cocktail - if you go to Megu, do not order this. Instead, order the Blessing Cocktail. I tried some of NYCSD's and it was the best cocktail I have ever enjoyed. Don't get me wrong, the Jade Candy was nice... but it just wasn't something I would order again.

We then left Hell and went to Heaven. Megu is designed in such a way that when you enter you're taken through Hell, Purgatory and then you finally arrive in Heaven. The bar is designed to be hell with Japanese punk-techno music. It's beautiful, two walls are rolls of kimono fabric encased in glass. It's beautiful. You then enter Purgatory, which isn't anything special, instead you look into the dining room through a charcoal coloured glass and see Heaven. However, in Purgatory you once enjoyed your appetizers. Now, this is not the case. You're then led down stairs to Heaven and finally enjoy your appetizers and meal.

I allowed Alex to order for me - the menu was rather complex and offered so many different items. I started off with a five sashimi sampler. I didn't take pictures of my food or at all because I would have felt terribly tacky. However, my food arrived in a square serving dish that was illuminated just like this on a bed of ice. The sashimi was carefully arranged on a palm leaf which was further decorated with two carrot florets and some other pretties. The fish here is flown in every day, fresh from Japan! They only order from the best fisheries as well, of course.

The sashimi was then followed by kobe beef skewed on bamboo. This again, is not a picture I took - which would explain the ugly hands holding the meal. My meal however arrived in the same way, the order in which they were arranged was different though. From left to right I had a wonderful "gempei" miso kobe beef skewer (this is the second from the left in the picture). I enjoyed it so much that I ate all of it before moving onto the rest. Which was a terrible mistake, I wish I had saved it for last. I then ate different pieces as I moved along throughout this course. The next one I tasted was the black sesame (the first one on the left) This tasted very much like a flower. It was such a pretty taste. The third was the soy garlic (the last one from the left) Which tied as my first place skewer. The gempei miso and soy garlic were by far the best. The last was soy&wasabi. This was my least favourite. The wasabi is spicy but also has a sweetness to it. I enjoyed the wasabi a lot. This is because it's freshly prepared by grating real wasabi on actual shark skin. I didn't enjoy this skewer much because the flavour was so intense until you chewed it all together and then you start to enjoy it. I don't enjoy working so much to enjoy my food.

Megu is known for their grean tea crepes. It's about 25 crepes all stacked on top of each other carefully. I ordered the sweet five dessert platter for myself at NYCSD's behest. I was treated to several desserts on one plate. This included: green tea crepes, vanilla sorbet? (I don't know how to explain this.. but it was like frozen vanilla milk - not as creamy as ice cream), mango sorbet, mango coconut something, chocolate and bitter orange something, chocolate truffles and creme puffs! The creme puffs, chocolate truffles (they literally evaporated in my mouth), vanilla sorbet,  mango sorbet were my favourites. The green tea crepes had too strong of a taste. The dessert sample is also a great value. You get standard sized desserts for a little bit more than what one single dessert would cost you.

We also enjoyed a fine bottle of Sake during our meal. It was beautiful. It had an initial licorice taste which then faded away into florals. It tasted like a beautiful memory. I don't recall the name. But I would definitely have it again.

Dinner total: Over $700.00 - which is normal when he takes me out to eat.

We ended dinner, enjoyed a cigarette and walked around for a while. If you read my most current post, you'll find out exactly what happened next.

Sebastian

And off I go!

Finally boarding my flight after delays and reroutes. I'll let you all know when I arrive in NYC. Lite dinner tonight since NYCSD has work tomorrow and must turn in early.. meaning I have all night and most of the day to do whatever I would like. :) I'm thinking I'll wake up to a mimosa tomorrow morning ;)

Sebastian